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May 21, 2007
Fatwah Alert!
This time its veggie vendors....
Buried in an AP story about Sunnis fighting al-Qaida is this little tidbit:
"American commanders cite al-Qaida's severe brand of Islam, which is so extreme that in Baqouba, al-Qaida has warned street vendors not to place tomatoes beside cucumbers because the vegetables are different genders, Col. David Sutherland said."
Unfriggin believable, but true. What a bunch of backwards and demented freaks. Sheesh.
I swear, YCMTSU!
Hat tip to the Republican Riot, by way of Anti-Mullah (nice carrots Alan!).
Posted by LindaSoG at May 21, 2007 07:47 PM
Comments
Okay...so...This Al-Qaeda guy, Al-Qaeda Harry, says "keep the veggies separated or they'll schtup each other."
"You're crazy," the vendor says. "Veggies ain't got gonads, you knuckle-knob!"
"Oh, yeah?!" Al-Qaeda Harry replies. "How about 'Check out the tomatas on that babe?' and 'You wanna smoke my cucumber?'"
Then the vendor gets nervous.
"Maybe you got a point," the vendor says.
This is the insidious spread of Al-Qaeda.
Posted by: Kevin M at May 21, 2007 08:04 PM
"Backward and demented" is being rather kind to them, doncha think? You MUST include "ignorant" in the equation as a bare minimum.
Not to be pedantic or didactic about it, but that which contains the seeds is the fruit, not the veggie part of a plant. Veggies are generally the root, stem, or leaf.
Further, for it to BE a fruit, it had to originate as an ovary; ergo, all fruits are female in gender (even though the discussion is ludicrous in the first place -- I mean, who gives a rat's ass!!!).
Now . . . if a Muslim fundamentalist wants to make the prurient connection between the phallus and cucumber and tomatoes and ta-tas, apparently he's been spending WAY too much time on Internet prOn sites, thereby making him anathemous to and completely ineligible to be a member of the Taliban.
He and all those who agree with him should be taken to the Qa'aba and publicly goatfucked repeatedly for 40 days and 40 nights while Eurasian femdoms pelt him with overripe plums, kumquats, mangoes, and papayas, preferably during Ramalamadingdong.
Posted by: eros total at May 21, 2007 08:24 PM
It's more vile than that. Johnny Jihadi decides it, and then tells you to do it. Or he'll kill you, rape your sister and kill her, and then kill the rest of your extended family. You know he's serious because he did it to Achmed in the next street over last week. So you put the cucumbers away from the tomatoes.....or you quit selling vegetables, cover your wife, daughter, and sister from head to toe, and hope to survive another day.
Allah akbhar!
We cannot back down one step.
Posted by: Fred Jameson at May 22, 2007 08:55 AM